Home > emolicious, hope > Break


November 22, 2008 Leave a comment Go to comments

I have so many thoughts and posts I want to make, and yet when I sit down to write I can’t start.  I think I am going to take a break from the blog for the week, and just relax at home.  I am so looking forward to good, Chinese, home cooked meals.

Topics for future blog posts:

  • Asian American culture and mental health lecture I attended – lots of thoughts about that!
  • Kids and family – I want one!
  • Career – I don’t have one!
  • Depression – I have it!

I am also feeling a little anxious, as my PAP came back slightly abnormal.  They have to run more tests to see what’s going on in my cervix.  Wonderful.  I am not sure whether I should break my no-contact rule now and tell SR, or wait a few weeks until I get more conclusive results.  Having fully scared myself shitless by reading up on all the potential consequences of an HPV infection, I am now in a state of continual low-level anxiety.  It could be everything from a low-risk strain that disappears in a few months, or one of over a dozen strains that is the leading cause of cervical, vulval, or anal cancer.

So now, in addition to my belief of personal insignificance in our vast human population of several billion, I might also potentially become another medical statistic.

I think I’m going to go eat some chocolate now, it could be nothing on continual repeat in my head.

Categories: emolicious, hope
  1. Wilhelmina
    November 23, 2008 at 12:32 am

    Oh, god, I miss homecooked Asian food too…

    Hope everything works out. Yes, it might be nothing, but best wait for results and try not to worry too much now… =(

  2. November 29, 2008 at 4:14 pm

    Thanks, Wilhelmina. I’m trying not to stress out too much…

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