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memory vomit

October 13, 2008 Leave a comment Go to comments

After a brief dry period last week where I had no libido whatsoever, I am craving being filled again.  Filled everywhere…in my ass, in my mouth, in my cunt – but especially in the ass and mouth.  I’m not sure why, but I get a strong desire to have a cock shoved in my mouth at sporadic moments throughout the day: during class, or at a meeting, or driving to work.

And with this desire comes a flood of memories of SR and all the delicious ways we fucked throughout the summer.  Like that first time, when he fucked me in the shower while I was on my period (my first time having menstrual sex), and we scrambled around trying to find a foothold for him to penetrate me.  The night we fucked seemingly for hours in every position possible, until my throat was hoarse, my muscles were shaky from the force of his hips slamming repeatedly into mine, and my brain was swimming in a lake of endorphins.  Our night (and subsequent morning) of debauchery in the motel near my campus after watching Secretary.

Speaking of that night, I revisited that particular motel with a friend who was scoping out all the hotels around campus for a cheap place to put up her parents for this weekend.  I had tagged along to go grocery shopping, but stopping by that motel I couldn’t help but smile.  I turned to my friend with a grin and said, “I have to admit, I have some great memories of this place.”  To which she groaned an “Oh God” and rolled her eyes.

I seem to develop very strong memory associations from the guys I’ve been with.  I am reminded of Tim with every mention of a boat, Salem, or Maine.  Taiwan, linguistics, ESL, poker, and investing make me think of M.  And now, seeing any Audi on the street reminds me of SR, as well as any mention of casinos or Boston.  It is frustrating, because to my dismay, there are always quite a number of Audis out on the road.  Like I’m not having enough trouble trying not to think of him as it is!

Finally, I found this interesting book, Sex with Your Ex (and 69 other tempting things you should never do again), via The OverEducated Nympho.  Here is what it says (according to the table of contents on Amazon.com).  I crossed out the no-no’s I have committed:

  1. Never have sex with your ex
  2. Never have sex with a friend simply for the benefits
  3. Never reveal your number of sexual partners
  4. Never make out with someone while chewing gum
  5. Never let him keep photos of you in your birthday suit
  6. Never let your friend sleep with somebody you have dirt on
  7. Never accept a lame proposal
  8. Never ask your girlfriend to be part of a threesome
  9. Never go after him if he has a girlfriend or wife
  10. Never hide your natural smell
  11. Never try to get some action when your parents are in the vicinity
  12. Never lead him on if you’re not interested
  13. Never show up on his doorstep after a night of drinking
  14. Never throw yourself into his hobbies if they’re not your cup of tea
  15. Never use the toilet in front of your partner
  16. Never lie about cheating
  17. Never show jealousy
  18. Never get below-the-belt piercings
  19. Never abstain from sex just because you’re having your period
  20. Never apologize…
  21. Never write your ex a letter letting him know “how you feel”
  22. Never continue dating him if he openly lusts after other women
  23. Never freak at the sight of an uncircumcised penis
  24. Never fake orgasm
  25. Never get married to please someone else
  26. Never ask if it’s in yet
  27. Never be afraid to show him what feels good
  28. Never believe him when he says, “Don’t worry, I’ll pull out.”
  29. Never go overboard on imitating a stripper
  30. Never have sex on a first date
  31. Never let him – or anyone else – know what you did on spring break (or in Vegas)
  32. Never believe him when he says he didn’t cheat if the evidence suggests otherwise
  33. Never go to a psychic for advice on your love life when you’re desperate
  34. Never tell him how much you love your vibrator
  35. Never dive in on rigorous sex without visiting the ladies’ room first
  36. Never stalk your ex
  37. Never date a jerk, even if he’s beautiful
  38. Never drop your girlfriends for your guy
  39. Never keep you ex’s number in your cell phone, phonebook, speed dial, or buddy list
  40. Never break up in public
  41. Never have sex with your best friend’s ex – or vice versa
  42. Never tell your date you Googled him
  43. Never hook up with brothers or roommates
  44. Never have sex if you’re drunk and feeling queasy
  45. Never be too lax about his friendships with females
  46. Never answer your phone during sex
  47. Never tell your friend you don’t like her partner/fiancé
  48. Never take advice from just anyone about sex
  49. Never check his e-mail “just to see what he’s been up to”
  50. Never ask him if you look fat
  51. Never fall for the line, “I feel a connection between us”
  52. Never date a guy who won’t introduce you to his friends
  53. Never send e-mail that includes details of your latest sexual exploits to a coworker
  54. Never get involved with him if he still lives with his parents, ex-wife, ex-girlfriend, or college buddies
  55. Never talk about things your previous lovers did in bed
  56. Never date a guy who’s more concerned about his hair than you are about yours
  57. Never have more to drink on a first date than he does
  58. Never get involved with a guy who’s not as smart as you are
  59. Never engage in sex play unless you really feel playful
  60. Never send him dirty text messages while he’s at work
  61. Never divulge all of your fantasies
  62. Never have sex with a guy who keeps his socks on
  63. Never be seduced by Mother Nature
  64. Never ask your boyfriend which of your friends he would sleep with if he weren’t with you
  65. Never give road head in a moving vehicle
  66. Never have sex during a rebound
  67. Never go home with someone else just to make your guy jealous
  68. Never lie about having an STD
  69. Never say the wrong name during sex
  70. Never say never
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Categories: anal, life, links, sex, sundry, writing
  1. Lucky Seven
    October 14, 2008 at 11:49 pm

    I love how you talk about your appetite, your craving to be filled. No matter how many voracious women I have known, I always feel the pull of early social conditioning that “women don’t want sex,” or that they don’t want it the way I want it – in their mouth, their cunt, their ass.

    Beautiful. Validating. Refreshing. Hope you find some satisfaction soon.

  2. October 18, 2008 at 3:42 pm

    I am hoping to find some satisfaction soon too! And I feel the pull of that early social conditioning as well…that I shouldn’t want sex as much as I do. I’m still not completely free from it. But it is refreshing to find other women who are honest and open about their sexuality here, since I grew up believing I was some kind of sex freak for having the desires and fantasies that I have.

    We are out there! Just waiting to devour/be devoured by a man of similar appetite 😉

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